crying — Blog — Heather Sande

SOS: When parenting is really really really hard

Monday I came down with a cold. My husband is in the thick of a very challenging season at work. My 4-year-old has been so full of anger the past month it’s been like parenting a ticking time bomb. My seven-year-olds new thing is complaining about everything. The sun hasn’t shone in 6 days. There are toys and paper and crumbs everywhere. I lost my temper again this morning. My sinuses are pounding. I feel like a fraud.

It’s Wednesday and I have run out of silver linings.

And I know I’m not alone and yet it feels so isolating. It’s a heavy weight on our shoulders knowing there is no hero riding in to save the day. It’s just us. And we are tired.

*sigh*

So I’m writing this for me and for every parent out there: how to be a parent when things are really really really hard.

Reality baking shows and accepting my failures as a gentle parent

The other day I found myself crying over and over during a reality baking show.

The past week my 6-year-old has been quite prickly. She’s picking fights with her sister. She’s been less cooperative and easily combative. Getting ready for bed, getting ready for school or leaving the house anytime, has become quite fraught. I’ve been doing ‘all the things’ reducing separation, quality playtime, welcoming feelings, holding boundaries, controlling the environment etc. But not much has changed.

Daycare Drop Offs: When does the crying stop?

How long before my child stops crying at drop off?

When does it get easier?

I can hear my daughter crying as I leave the daycare and it’s excruciating!

When transitioning to daycare, all we are thinking about is how to stop the crying. It’s loud, intense and having to walk away when they are still upset, feels awful. Stopping the crying can become the goal.

Looking for something in particular? Search ‘sleep’ or ‘highly sensitive’ for the resources you need!