Six plus year of parenting and our household had managed to avoid the dreaded HFM (hand foot and mouth) disease. When our streak came to an end two weeks ago, it wasn’t due to my daycare attending 3-year-old, no, I was the one to succumb. I figured I’d bounce back quickly, that the worst would be over in 24 to 48 hours. In reality, 13 days later, I’m still recovering.

Being sick for so long gave me a lot of time to just think. As humans, we are always trying to make sense of life. Why did this happen to me? What is the point of this? What did I learn? And while I wouldn’t wish this on anyone, I have a few takeaways to share. 

1. Silver linings

   • I’m beyond grateful to have a partner who was generally available and able to keep things going while I basically laid in bed all day. I have a small but mighty village.

   • It can be tough to step out of the default parent role. But in this case, it had to happen. It’s comforting to be reminded my husband is more than capable of handling it all. And it’s also helpful for my husband to experience being the default parent again. It’s so beneficial to our relationship when we both share in the full responsibilities of parenting. 

2. I’m really strong

   • There were moments when I just had to pull it together and get stuff done. Like when I had a temperature of 103 and the kids had to be picked up. Of course, it’s better to rest, but sometimes, we don’t have another option and it’s incredible what we can make happen to care for our kids. 

3. Boundaries 

   • I’ll admit, sometimes I struggle to say no. When my kids ask me to play or read another story I usually say yes. While I was sick I had to say no, a lot, because I physically couldn’t. After a few days of this, I noticed an increase in independent play. My takeaway is that when it comes to successfully setting a boundary I need to be more firm with my tone and more patient for it to sink in. I’m happy to be getting back to playing with my kids, but in the moments I need to complete a task, I’m more confident they can manage. 

This little list has given me a mental boost as I push through to full recovery. But after experiencing this wretchedness firsthand, more than anything, I’m just very grateful neither of my kids got sick. The only thing worse would have been watching my kids suffer through this! 

Stay well and wash your hands. 

-Heather